剧情纵览
床上功夫是中國功夫中最鮮為人知的一門盡學,其中吹、騎、摸、啜、插的各式套路,普通女子學上一招半式也受用一生,假如由樣靚身材正的掌門親身赤裸表演,威力當然不一樣。掌門的36吋巨乳加上床上功夫,必定能使床上功夫發揚光大....
床上功夫是中國功夫中最鮮為人知的一門盡學,其中吹、騎、摸、啜、插的各式套路,普通女子學上一招半式也受用一生,假如由樣靚身材正的掌門親身赤裸表演,威力當然不一樣。掌門的36吋巨乳加上床上功夫,必定能使床上功夫發揚光大....
影视公司宣传企划杨佳(刘诗诗 饰)得了怪病,命悬一线。暗恋她的程序员刘同(胡夏 饰)为使她不留遗憾,决定在她每次昏迷苏醒之际,以穿越之名为她圆梦。但,刘同的行动并不顺利,除了突发情况带来的穿帮,还有来自情敌尹哲(大左 饰)的奋力阻挠、戳穿。刘同竭尽全力与重重困难斗智斗勇,结果却完全出人意料——原来,杨佳并非真病,她是为对付上司骚扰,佯作患疾。刘同的努力,她完全明了,刘同为她精心设计的从民国到未来,跨越200年的美妙梦境,让杨佳深受感动。大家到此方才恍然大悟。可是,又一个意外横飞而来……
一位貌似耶稣的小偷(Horácio Salinas 饰)从儿童们的石块击打中醒来,与一个无手无脚的侏儒结伴进入城市。城中正进行一场疯狂的庆典,一些人被杀死,鸟雀从他们的枪口中飞出,大量蟾蜍穿着印第安人以及欧洲殖民者的服装在混战中被炸的粉碎。小偷从几个罗马士兵打扮的人手中接过十字架,又被他们将自身的形象制造成无数模型……小偷在众目睽睽下爬上了一座能生产黄金的高塔,塔内的术士从小偷的粪便中提炼出了金子。术士用占星术确认了几位门徒,他们是生产面具的商人、武器商、艺术家、玩具商、政府顾问、军队长官和建筑师,七人分别代表不同的行星。术士把这些掌控国家的人物积聚一起,抛弃一切之后向传说中的圣山进发寻找不朽的秘密。
Set in an underground dungeon inhabited by bundled, ragged human beings, after the nuclear holocaust. The story follows the wanderings of a hero through the situations of survival. People wait for the Ark to arrive and rescue them while their habitat falls apart. Delving deep into the dusty and long abandonded vaults of b-cinema in search of lost gems always leaves me with a bittersweet taste. On one hand the discovery of unexpected gems where no one would think them possible is a rewarding experience. On the other hand though it makes one wonder how many of these remarkable low-budget oddities, personal love affairs of directors never quite famous and now all but forgotten, have almost forever slipped from memory? n any case what we have here is a little post-apocalyptic gem from Poland that is really better than it has any right to. The dystopian near future of O-BI, O-BA finds a group of survivors of the nuclear war that ravaged the Earth inhabiting an underworld concrete bunker and biding their time as they wait for the mysterious Ark, an air ship of some kind that will come and save them. The Ark proves to be an elaborate hoax, carefully designed to give hope to the malnourished and desperate denizens of the bunker, while in the meantime the dome that separates their miserable existence from the nuclear winter outside is slowly caving in. What first striked me about the movie is the design of the bunker and the depiction of the survivors. The survivors are gaunt, filthy and terrible-looking penitents, dressed in rags and aimlessly wandering the neon-lit halls of the bunker like automatons. The bunker is a rundown, seedy place, with bright neon lights peering from all sides like the eyes of malignant beasts. On one hand it is a slightly 80's depiction of the dystopian future but the movie never stoops down to MAD MAX cheese. Instead it combines biting political satire with the bleak outlook of a world with no future, black comedy with barbs on apathy, religion and power. The survivors, for example, are fed some kind of flour dropping from a tube that hovers in the air - later on we discover the food supervisor uses books and the Bible itself as filler for this meagre meal. There are many such short symbolic touches, perhaps not life-changing or faith-restoring, yet playful, clever and inspired. One thing is for sure; O-BI, O-BA is not your run-of-the-mill sci-fi schlock. It overcomes its modest budget with creativity and has genuine artistic aspirations both from a writing and directing perspective. My opinion is that it should have been filmed in black and white instead of colour though. The director uses atmospheric light and shadow to great effect and it would have registered even better in stark black and white. The blue-green neon on the other hand outstays its welcome after a while. Just a minor gripe in an otherwise solid b-movie with its heart set in all the right places. Imagine a less bleak THE ROAD (Cormac McCarthy) being injected with the satire and humour of DR.STRANGELOVE and you're getting there. See it if you can find it.
Kyohei Aizawa, an assassin for a covert non-governmental espionage group in Japan called "SEEK", is grieving over the loss of his girlfriend from a tragic plane accident. The leader of "SEEK",Ryo Mikumo, contacts him for an emergency mission; save a fellow agent, recover a new highly explosive liquid called "RDX@", stop a ruthless Yakuza leader, Sojiro Kotsuki, and his gang before they take over Japan. Although the Ninjas were thought to have disappeared... the new breed of assassins live on helping to protect Japan and all that is right; the Ninjas are coming soon.